Chapter 2: Figuring Out Who I Wanted to be

Where was I going to stay now? Really wish it was Skyscrappers but I have no phone because I had to rush to the airport. I guess I will have call this person who I believe is my friend. Truly up to this day I dont get our relationship, I dislike so many things about him, yet if I am dying they would be someone I will tell the paramedics to contact because I know they will be there immediately. I probably should mend our relationship, in due time... Anyway where was I? Right! Looking for a hall to stay on. I decided to call him and as usual he came through and helped me out, everything was in full swing and to my surprise my dad paid the accommodation. I was ready to take on the world.

As I entered the dorm, exhausted, I looked for my room out of the eight rooms. Then entire flat seemed to be occupied it was just me to take up my newly found position in life. The place was buzzing with excitement, wait I am lying. One room was buzzing with excitement which happened to be the room opposite mine.  Before I got time to rest my bags down the flat welcomed me, along with the guests my new roommates were having over.  Her guests were alotta handsome... But at that point in time I wanted to retreat to my own little corner away from all the noise. As I continued to unpack ascending and descending  several flights of stairs on my last trip I had a not so pleasant surprise. There he was on my bed 'hi, I am Clint' I was thoroughly disgusted. In my head I'm like why is this mudda cunt nigga in my room. But what actually left my well brought up mouth was 'hi nice to meet you Clint, why are you in my room?' he laughed and as he got closer I could have smelt the liquor on his breath and for some strange reason that drove me wild. I calmly covered up my interest in him and told him he's drunk and I am very tired if its possible that he leaves my room. So obviously you guys know what comes next, I stalked him which was pretty easy he partied alot plus he was always in my flat. And I am not shy to head out to a party. There was this one party where we in each others vicinity and I told myself I am going in for the kill. Well evidently we were on the same page because by the time i looked around he was right there behind me just as I imagined. So I had to 'show him how the thing go' (Nessa Preppy - Tingo (Official Music Video) "2018 Soca" [HD] for a better understanding),  and that was it, we were friends.

We studied together, we went to parties together,  we laid down in the same small cramped bed... We spoke about most things and he was funny. I won't say inseparable but if you needed to know where I was just look for him. There was one moment that stood out for me was when my aunt passed. I completely disappeared although we weren't extremely close something about this aunt made me feel happy. She was so carefree and fun, anytime music would play she dance no matter where she was. Her vibrancy could be felt from miles away... God I wished I knew her better. But lets return to the story... So when times got rush I went to one of my friends who shared the same cultural background as me... SIKE. I just had to be away from the only person who I believed could have notice something was wrong with me, Clint. I wasn't ready to deal with all those emotions. Little did I know there was a knock on my friends door and one of my roommates Leigh, was exclaiming about how long she had been looking for me and Clint wanted to see me now like some shit out of 50 shades.  I was already caught so I bid my friend adieu and went back to our dorm with her. As I entered the flat I was greeted with a harsh look. Yes his eyes made me melt and at the same time terrorized my soul, they spoke to me and this time they were saying where the fuck were you and who with? Instead his eyes softened and he asked me if I wanted to go out with them. It was Friday and I definitely didnt need him  sitting down evaluating my disposition so I meekly shook my head approvingly and went to get ready. So your girl was ready... Looking like a snack! I made this deal with myself that i will drink and dance away the pain. And I must say I lived up to that deal being the second time I got drunk in my life. I drank everything in sight that was my first lesson in what happens to you when you mix drinks. Well dancing whole night I didnt need much of an incentive to do so but that night I was dancing for my aunt who had passed with no care, no inhibitions. And believe it or not this was the first time Clint and I kissed. If I told you it was magical I would have been lying cause I could barely remember the night, boy I was a mess.

Beside the fact that he had a beard that was constructed by the gods he really cared about me. The same morning of the party I was tucked into bed and woke up to a whopper with cheese along with fries and a not so cold drink due to the fact that I had been asleep for ages. I wont say he loved me at this point... Too much has occurred that proved to me otherwise. But what I do know that he was having a hard time just as myself putting his feelings together for me. At this point I categorized him as someone who just wanted to protect you 24/7, doesn't want you but just doesn't leave you alone for you to find a next bloody man! Yup, I was in deep and you know the best thing to do when you are in a situation like this... Have sex with him that always makes shit easier (please bear in mind that entire previous sentence was sarcasm do not... I repeat DO NOT have sex with a nigga that makes you feel this way). At this point I made a decision where I would just have sex with him with no condom and leave it like that (Lord fadda I chupid boy). But that's the girl I was willing to be to make him apart of my life.

You guys must be wondering what's up with my grades and classes and the whole university experience... Well yeah I am wondering the same thing cause boy oh boy at this point I'm fucking shit up.